My favourite places to talk shit on campus

For the first time in my life, I was told that I was “the quietest person” in the room. I’ve never been told this before because I am very loud — so loud that I am usually referred to as loud and annoying, even if I’m shy in a new setting. I guess I just have an ear-splitting voice. 

This person mistook my disliking towards them as ‘quietness.’ I didn’t argue, because I disliked them so much I couldn’t bear the breath it would take to tell them this but it led me to think about all of the places I have talked louder than I should have, particularly on campus. 

Treadmill in the Arc

My new favourite place to put my life on display is whilst 12-3-30 incline walking with my sister. Since we’re working hard, we are only mildly out of breath and are still able to carry on a near perfect dialogue. The gym is relatively noisy, and most people have headphones on so I take this as my opportunity to really bark out information I shouldn’t be. 

I’m amazed at how unaware of my surroundings I am when I’m in the gym; what is the likelihood of some of those people around me not listening to their music at full volume or being in between songs and catching a snippet of some vile gossip I’m sharing. Albeit, it doesn’t really matter; it’s not about them, but something I’ve learned is a place as big as UBC isn’t really that big at all — people are better connected than you think.

The bus loop

This one offers a side of adrenaline to your typical shit talk. You are taking a risk and the amount of times I have been on the phone dropping legal names while waiting for the R4 is appalling. There are clusters of people around, moving so quickly and it is just impossible to identify someone especially in a mask. 

So be warned, while it’s tempting to gossip killing time waiting for the bus, be alert! You never know who could sneak up behind you to surprise you — oh, that person you haven’t seen since first year but just heard some scathing news about that you were just about to tell… Oh hey! No, how have you been?

Buchanan D bathroom

Tale as old as time, what else am I doing in the Buchanan D bathroom. If I actually had to use the washroom I would go to Buchanan A, so I’m probably on the phone with my mom. And right when you think you’re alone, and you bring out the specifics, you’ll hear a toilet flush or a shoe squeak and you will just pray to Mr. Buchanan himself it’s not one of the people you went to high school with who also studies arts at UBC. 

Education library


Whisper gossiping hits differently particularly to avoid literally any other task at hand. For my friends and I, this is a sacred place. Going to this library incites that there will be lunch, coffee and not a single book opened. Phones will be turned off and I will be more attentive than I was in my entire exhausting 50-minute lecture. I have not only said, but also been subject to learn terrible, scandalous and blatantly controversial things in this environment. It is the education library, so good thing I’m learning something with all the time I’ve spent cooped up here.