As you speed walk your way down Main Mall to get your third iced coffee of the day, do you ever wonder how different your life would have been if you were straight? Me neither. But, you came out of the closet just to fill that vacated space to the brim with cuffed jeans and thrifted flannels. I bet you even tuck your t-shirts into your high waisted pants, don’t you? Don’t you?
Being Queer not only grants you entry into the alphabet mafia, it also has medical benefits. Well, not in the legal sense, but it does keep your joints flexible — letting others know that you’re Queer is just a flick of the wrist these days.
Your friends at Girlbossmopolitan got your back — here are a few reasons why being Queer is the best thing to ever happen to you… like ever.
Music
Listening to Queer artists is a great time for anyone, but it’s an even better experience when you lean into your Queer identity. When you begin to feel comfortable in who you are, Queer music just hits different. All those years of replacing the pronoun in your favourite songs suddenly fades away. But that’s not even the best part — after figuring out that you’re Queer, you start to see Queer references in all kinds of songs. Is “Bohemian Rhapsody” just a certified banger, or is it also the world’s most-sung coming out ballad? “Any way the wind blows doesn’t really matter to me” — “Bohemian Rhapsody” walked so that Hairy Smiles’ “Medicine” could run. Yes, that song is Queer. Have you even listened to it?
Fashion
Long gone are the days of jeans and a hoodie — being Queer automatically adds +1 to your style. You want to pair an orange blouse with teeny tiny plastic dinosaurs on it with fishnets and volleyball shorts? You do you, fam. I mean, have you ever seen a straight person wearing something like that? I didn’t think so. Being Queer gives you the freedom to mix-and-match clothes that were never meant to be mixed and matched. And don’t get me started on matching your outfits to your hair colour… Icons, the lot of you.
Community
All jokes aside, existing as a Queer person isn’t all rainbows and Pride parades. Sometimes just existing is hard and you’ll need a good support system by your side. This is where Queer community comes in. Having people who get you — the authentic you — is why being Queer is the best thing to ever happen to you.
Girlbossmopolitan is The Ubyssey's annual spoof issue. While nothing in here is factual, it is all slaytastic. To read more Girlbossmopolitan, click here!
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