Satan in the living room: TV shows that are brainwashing your kids

Karen, a concerned suburban mother
author
Published on April 1, 2017
Pictured: the gaping maw of Hell. Karen

Last Wednesday night I decided to take my children, Kaycelynn and McGavyn, to see a film for some clean family fun. What I didn’t expect was a once family-friendly company such as Dinsey to be shoving the gay agenda down my children’s throats.

Immediately after the film's “gay moment” we left the theatre, drove to Bed Bath & Beyond to buy another Live. Laugh. Love sign for our bathroom, and I sat my children down to watch Pawn Stars to remove the moment from their minds. But every channel we turned to was showing some other liberal propagandist bunch of malarky — first Arthur, then The Magic School Bus… I was horrified. So I thought I’d make a list for every parent to read so they can protect their children from hidden liberal mind worms.

A Bug’s Life

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[''] Karen

A story of ants working together to make equal contributions for the greater good. What’s that smell? COMMUNISM.

Lion King

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Simba may appear to be a symbol of the American Dream, but he only gets to be king after being raised by two men (don’t pretend that Timon and Pumbaa are just ‘friends’).

Care Bears

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[''] Karen

There’s no way this show isn’t a metaphor for the hippie communes of the 1960s. I’m 99% sure their “belly magic” is a metaphor for the streams of acid the government put in our water system.

Silence of the Lambs

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[''] Karen

Full disclosure, I thought this movie was going to be about sleeping barnyard animals. But the cannibalism ended up being the least of my worries. About half way through, my son McGavyn turned to me and asked said, “Mommy, are all men serial killers? How come the women get to be the heroes while the men just sit around and eat people?” I had to turn off the TV and explain to him that just because he’s a man doesn’t mean he can’t follow his dreams.

The Lorax

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[''] Karen

Liberals may be trying to win our respect by modelling the Lorax after a certain orange-haired conservative icon. But don’t be fooled, the Lorax is nothing but an evolution-loving, global-warming believing, tree-hugging liberal sock-puppet.