How to beat the BC heat

It’s not summer if your friends’ Instagram stories aren’t full of pool pics and frozen treats, but this week the sun kicked it up a notch. Now, instead of captions like, “Lake Day with my Babes” social media has turned into the worst kind of “Hot Girl Summer” — the kind where people stare at you, not because you’re physically attractive, but because your “tan” is bright red and you’re coated in sweat.

If you aren’t blessed by the air-conditioning gods, this heat wave might feel like a preview of a fiery afterlife. Here are a few ways to beat the heat this summer.

Cold showers aren’t just for puberty

Believe it or not, the best way to stay cool is to literally bring your body temperature down. Taking a cold shower not only helps you get rid of all that sweat you’ve been secreting like you were before your first exam, it’s also a great way to avoid those pesky roommates who keep asking you to help clean out the freezer to make room for popsicles.

Make new friends

The university experience isn’t complete unless you can look back and cringe at your pathetic attempts to make those “friendships that will last a lifetime” that your mom keeps bringing up when she reminisces about her uni days. But in this heat, your new friend doesn’t have to check off all the boxes — they just need to have air-conditioning in their apartment. Or a pool. Or both.

Eat so much ice cream

Every time you use your hand to fan yourself in an awkward attempt to let those around you know that you don’t usually look like a tomato — it’s just this darned heat — you’re missing out on the opportunity to spoon creamy ice cream into your mouth.

Science side of UBC, if I keep putting cold treats into my body, how can my body get too warm? Try and explain that!

Become lizard

Lizards come in many varieties — all of them cute. But most importantly, lizards thrive in the heat.

I really don’t know why this wasn’t your first thought when you heard about the heat wave…