Monday, November 24, 2014
Last updated: 9 hours ago

Four wines for the tragically alone on Valentine’s Day

Photo Kai Jacobson/The Ubyssey

Photo Kai Jacobson/The Ubyssey

Need wine for that intimate, romantic dinner? That’s great. Stop reading this article and go away.

My single-hearted brethren, have no fear: even though alcohol is one of the worst bandages for a non-special Valentine’s Day, there’s no harm in trying to make the best of it.

But first: the prime Valentine’s wine-pairing tip? Stay clear of chocolate with champagne, unless you want your drink to taste like those lemons that life is throwing at you. If you’re adamant on stuffing your face with chocolate, skip the dry sparkling wines and go for something sweeter and richer, like port.

2011 Sumac Ridge Private Reserve Gewurztraminer

After a nauseating week of incessant heart-themed decor and cheesy Facebook quotes, cooking a nice meal might seem unappealing. So why not pick up a bottle of white and some takeout?

Gewurztraminer is a great pairing for Chinese takeout: its slight sweetness helps to quench delicious Sriracha-induced burning, and the grape has a unique flavour profile that typically involves lychee, spice and flowers.

This pink and fleshy grape variety has relatively higher amounts of alcohol and an oily, smooth texture; pair it with acoustic guitar covers and Adele on repeat.

Never mind, I’ll find someone like Gew. $14.99

2010 Andre Vinet Muscadet de Sèvre-et-Maine Sur Lie Le Chant de la Mer

If you happen to be crying salty tears of loneliness, have no fear. There’s a wine for that.

Muscadet, made from Melon de Bourgogne, has its home in the Loire Valley of France. Along with its delicate apple notes, this Muscadet has fresh briny and yeasty characteristics that happen to pair well with one of the unhappier bodily fluids.

But if you happen to do some cooking between bouts of tears, try this wine with lighter seafood — especially the aphrodisiac oyster. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and lots of them pair well with Muscadet. $21.99

2011 Maison Lorgeril L’Orangeraie Rosé

If seeing pink doesn’t trigger your gag reflex, this great value rosé will do wonders.

This wine exudes light strawberry notes along with fresh acidity and just a touch of sweetness. Rosé is quite versatile, so it’s great if you’re a last-minute dinner type — whether that calls for pizza for three or burgers and a Game of Thrones marathon for one.

Meat lovers, take note: smoked meats and savoury rosés match as well as hydration and a hangover. $14.99

Martini Asti

If your roommate hasn’t already left an empty bottle of this lying around somewhere, then here’s an introduction.

Sometimes drier wines aren’t cupid-made matches, so why not go for a combination of something sparkling, sweet and affordable?

With flavours that lean towards the sweeter green and stone fruit sections of the produce market, this quaffable, crowd-pleasing white is sure to resound well with lighter desserts. Don’t want to spoil yourself? Pair this with a fruit salad.

At seven per cent ABV, it’s not so much of an alcoholic commitment, unlike that one crappy relationship that you’d much rather never bring up again.

Cheers to that! $12.99

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