You’ve heard about Wreck Beach, but you’ve never been there. That’s the NAKED beach, right? Old wrinkly guys, ew!

Then comes a warm sunny day and you feel adventurous. So, you pack a towel and some sunscreen and head on down. Trail 6 has 436 stairs and you try to forget that what goes down must eventually come up. Near the bottom, you hear the ocean, people talking and laughing, and music. You start to get excited…and then the first thing you see is a sixty-year-old guy and his junk.

You almost turn around, but the thought of facing those stairs again makes you continue on. It’s at that moment you notice something. There are people who look like your grandparents, but there are also families with their children, people in their thirties tanning and groups who look college-age.

You set up your towel next to a group of hip-looking people and lay back, scoping out the scene, and trying not to gawk but failing miserably. Some guy walks by you chanting “icy cold organic soft drinks!” You consider buying one, but then you hear someone hawking beer. Minutes after that, someone walks by selling‚ wait a minute, did she just say pot brownies? And exactly what kind of mushrooms is that guy advertising? You feel like you’re fitting in already, and make a mental note to investigate further after a nap.

The water looks inviting, so you decide to take a quick dip. You gasp as the chill hits you. It’s not as warm as it looks. A group of people are playing frisbee while standing waist-deep in the ocean; dramatic dives are frequent. Skimboarders comb the shoreline, following the waves. You cheer as one of them catches a big one and jumps in the air, and laugh as someone else wipes out.

As you leave the ocean, you hear the most melodious music. A man is playing a type of percussion instrument; he tells you it’s a hang drum. A topless woman begins to dance. The sight of her slow and graceful movements combined with the music is hypnotising. When they stop, you exhale and only then realize you were holding your breath.

There are some booths selling hot dogs and other food. A little bazaar sells saris and other pieces of clothing; people are walking right up to try things on without having to use a changing room. You smile, because where else would you be able to do such a thing?

Through some casual conversation you find out that merchants are beach staples; some of them have been coming to the beach for years. They speak to you about the culture and community of Wreck. Some come virtually every day to vend, play music, meditate and socialize. A few of them even live at the beach, though it is definitely a taboo subject that not many are willing to discuss. You hear of recent crackdowns by the authorities, which is probably the reason why.

By this time, you’ve been at Wreck for a few hours, and you suddenly realize that nudity is beginning to seem normal. You’re not staring in shock and awe anymore, though you are definitely still appreciating the, ahem, natural beauty of the people present. You think that maybe next time you’ll work up the courage to take it all off.

It’s time to leave, and you cringe inwardly at the thought of all those steps. However, you realize those stairs have a major benefit: it keeps the beach secluded. Unlike other beaches, where you literally turn around and see a Starbucks, Wreck is a fair hike from civilisation. It really does feel like you’re in a different world, where you can leave your worries and stresses topside.

Of course, it would be nice if they put in modern plumbing‚ but you can’t have everything, right?

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